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(no subject) [Feb. 12th, 2006|07:12 pm]
life makes no sense...

tell me how yalls is going...
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shay [Jan. 14th, 2006|02:29 pm]

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 must be cool to be able to do that huh?

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(no subject) [Dec. 13th, 2005|09:16 pm]
< lj-cut text= >

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my sister is hot...


aww me and shay

< /lj-cut >
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(no subject) [Dec. 10th, 2005|11:33 pm]
there is always a time and a place for your stupidity
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(no subject) [Nov. 28th, 2005|10:06 pm]
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tell me something special... or even better make me feel special. [Oct. 20th, 2005|11:22 am]
here's another boring post from me, surprised I still get some comments...

I just don't get why, well... I guess I so know why all these girls are in love with Shay. He's radiating this simply unique hilarious and intriguing personality... and out of all of these perfect, beautiful girls, he still only calls me everyday... stays at my house until his mom calls and wants him home... wants to dress up together for halloween... just so many little things like that...

brookes this beautiful, blue-eyed, smart, ballerina/any other kind of dancer.

audrys this theatricle, beautiful, long haired, brown-eyed, bubbly little princess.

faiths freaking hilarious.

chelsea so genuine and sweet.

and me.... im just Hope. All I can do is draw, paint, photograph and cut hair...

a little bit of me is just so jealous.

im not funny.
im not loud
but not quiet
im not beautiful
im not very smart....

so what am I exactly

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I'm always confuuuused.. [Oct. 17th, 2005|08:16 pm]
[mood |blankbut not ne]
[music |Stever Miller Band --- ummm, that put a pretty dress on song]

Zane smokes.... a lot, its become a stinky habit, he's old enough to do it but its dumb... so why?

Joel was smoking the other day, me and Shay tried it. But just to confirm the fact that we wouldn't like it. We didn't like it. Shay tried 7 times and couldn't figure it out. I tried once and enhaled, Its cause I'm mexican... what can I say!?

Shay's been dumb lately. He's... bored of life. We've done everything there is to do together (well... not everything...) and he's ready to be famous........... oh gee.

more theatre. I got the queen of hearts in alice and wonderland. I wanted it ... yay! Shay got the rabbit. He's also in Princess and the pea, but that production will be over soon.... I can't wait, its taking up so much time.

ummm, I've been dancing alot, ballet and ballroom (tango, swing, rumba) ballet being my favorite.

babysitting a lot too, and I like this $40 dollars a day thing.

I just miss the way everything used to be... last winter, him and I. I have a feeling we'll get better this coming winter... its a romantic time. I tend to love it....

I need you..
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huricanes [Sep. 23rd, 2005|11:00 pm]
For some reason a part of me feels like the world is slowly coming to an end. before the huricanes even began, what, 4 weeks ago? I had a strange dream that woke me up with a cold sweat and a heart beat faster than I have ever remembered being able to beat.

I was riding my bike around my neighborhood, with a little boy riding on the front handle, up ahead we spotted two young men, around the ages of 17-18. They were very, very nice looking, sparkly eyes, golden glowing hair.. beautiful. But the little boy informed me quickly that these two young men were leaving him with feelings... bad feelings. So he hopped off the bike and ran down the street, soon to approach his home.

I stayed parked, with one foot on my bike peddle. When the best looking one out of the two boys walked up to me. He didn't hesitate to start off his conversation by telling me "He was Jesus." I looked at him confused. Then the feeling the little boy had had suddenly hit me... I knew something wasn't right.

He was the antichrist. and he chased me, still claiming to be Jesus.

And when Jesus truly comes for us, the antichrist will come too, and claim to be Jesus.

Then 2 days later, the huricanes hit. Heart breaking... Yes. But it was so far away it didn't seem to make as big of an impact on me. I prayed for the people, and friends that I know that live in Louisiana. But now Rita... It's so close to us. Shay's grandmother's house was hit, and she now here.

We are having a older couple come and live with us... until they find a home.
most of our churches are full of people, they are being taken care of, and being given food and water and whatever is nessesary.

GAS IS OUTRAGEOUS. practically $3 a gallon. Last night there was only one gas station with gas for 2.42 down town, by time we got there there was no gas left.

Walmart is out of everything.


Pretty much everything, luckily we managed to get some toilet paper. Life would end without that.

To top it all off, my very best friend is "uncertain." He said he hopes its not the end of the world because he's afraid he'll get left behind. All I said was "Shay, did you ask Jesus into your heart?" He said, "yes, a gazillion times, just to make sure" so I told him he's safe.

it's just that nasty devil trying to make him doubt.

I know where I'm going when I die.
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mad mad mad [Sep. 21st, 2005|04:28 pm]
so mad, angered, agrivated, pissed...
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(no subject) [Sep. 7th, 2005|08:31 pm]

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I wish to be more like him, patiently waiting... content...


less focused on beauty that I lack...




or worrying about  the things so far above me...

things I could never reach...




like feeling hurt when my talents are overlooked by ones that are given to some un-naturally...


like my more artistic few of things...



at least someone notices...



but am I selfish for wishing his talents didn't take up so much of our time?


I miss this...



 and I miss my reactions to your jokes...


patience patience... someday I'll learn...



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(no subject) [Jul. 29th, 2005|11:36 am]
"Girls should hide their hearts in God, so boys will have to look to Him to find them."

my new favorite quote.

hehe, I am a funny ballerina.
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FART. its a hilarious thing... [Jul. 12th, 2005|04:40 pm]
I'm Giving up on childish games... but then again I was never into them.

like Girls faking friendships with you, to get closer to the one person you spend all you time with. It has worked, numerous times. And I get over it... but now all I can do is notice the hurt deep inside of me. Why? I don't know. I'm always so scared of losing my best friend. And I guess I'm the one who has to trust that I am what I am, and nothing is going to change what we are.

Does that make sense?

I'm so vulmerable, to everyone. I can't say no, I can't be mean... I could never tell him how I really feel about all these people because no one would understand, and I would hate to come across as self-centered.

And why do their eyes draw them to everything? Guys will like any girl who's beautiful, even if she sits in a corner with her arms crossed, and doesn't say a word to anyone, ever. I guess that is just a "now" thing, they'll grow up and over come it, I suppose.

But if you really think you're in love with the girl who lets you know exactly WHO she is, is not afraid of letting you see her as she is when you're not around, the girl with the bubbly personality, who laughs at everything you say, even if you're not funny at all, the girls who cares so much...

don't give that up, use your heart, not your eyes. I mean, her beauties either going to fade... or you'll become blind or something. (its a possiblility, be quiet!)

Ponder that...
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and the world keeps spinning in triangles. [Jun. 28th, 2005|09:48 pm]
when I'm around you, and you're talking to me, I never listen. I'd rather sit and stare at you, studying the way you talk, the breaths you take in between conversation, and your facial expressions. I've memorized them, and I know. I just sometimes wonder what he's thinking, why he zones out so frequently, why he randomly smiles, why he doesn't smile as much as he used to... why I would still try to impress him after so many years, and why everything stays the same. I wonder... is that my fault?

earlier today I felt insanely horrible. the kind of horrible that I wanted to cry because boys are the oddest human beings to ever grace the planet. I guess I'm just not used to change, as in thing not staying the same, as in me and shay's relationship. Where he calls me every day at 2:30, right before he goes to algebra class, and about 9:30 or 10 every night to tell me about his day (if we didn't spend it together.) things have changed since I started hanging out with his ex-girfriend, I've come to the conclusion she used me.

to get to him.
and it hurts, I wanted to be her friend. but little things have been happening lately that really make me question he motives.

first of all, why in the world did I have a party with her? I do not know. but she talked me into that... shay had left for dance camp a week before our party, and the night he came back, she was over... to stay the night, get her hair dyed and helf set up for the party. guess what color she dyed her hair? and guess how she wanted it cut... the exact same haircut as mine. NO lie. we look like bopsy twins.

but anyway, the night he got back he called me right away, and wanted to come over... but no one would take him so I got haley to do it. but I forgot to tell her that he told me his mom would bring him later, so she ended up just leaving to get him and he came to my house and surprised me with a big hug and presents.

then he asked me to trim his hair, and brooke was in my room when he said "man, I'm so glad to be home" and I said "yes, I am too, you were missed by me"
and he said "I tried to like, not think about... like... well, you. but about the 3rd day I told my friend 'man, I miss hope, and can't wait to go back home'"

that upsetted her, she was weird the whole night and the next day. and she was also upset when she found the note he left me before he left.

the worst part is I wanted to go garage saling for my birthday, this saturday. and I told her that. so I woke up at 7 and called shay and zane said brooke came by at 6:30 to take him. I was hurt... that she would back stab me like that.

I ended up calling her, and she dropped shay off at my house. then she ended up coming anyway.


I hate girls.
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aaand I stole this from david cause im bored and its hilarious. =D [Jun. 15th, 2005|12:38 pm]
1) YOUR PORN STAR NAME - (name of first pet + street you live on): Lilly Kidd

2) YOUR MOVIE STAR NAME - (grandmother's first name + favorite snack): Wella Pickle

3) YOUR FASHION DESIGNER NAME - (first word you see on your left + favorite restaurant): Hopeynella Cheddars

4) YOUR FOREIGN NAME - (favorite spice girl + last foreign vacation spot): Posh Dallas

5) YOUR SOCIALITE NAME - (silliest childhood nickname + first town where you partied): (now) Humpous Tyler

6) YOUR "FLY GIRL/GUY" NAME - (first initial + first three letters of your last name): H. Sim

7) YOUR DETECTIVE NAME - (favorite animal + name of high school): Monkey Homeschool lol

8) YOUR BARFLY NAME - (last snack food you ate + your favorite alcoholic drink): Chips, dangit, i never drink

9) YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME - (middle name + street where you first lived): Hope Mcdonald

10) YOUR ROCK STAR NAME - (favorite candy + favorite musicians last name): Almond Joy Dupree?
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(no subject) [Jun. 14th, 2005|03:01 pm]
[mood |excitedexcited]
[music |Jack Johnson --- Banana Pancakes]

shay is out of town, he left sunday and wont be back until friday night, at some dance camp or something, but he'll be here for my party!!! its saturday, yay!!

yesterday I was looking through my notebook and found something he wrote saturday night, I'm guessing, it wasn't the last time I saw him but the last time he was over... it said:

"I'm gone to Mississippi (crying smilely face), have fun without me (if possible.) I love you, love Shay. (fart for me)"

kinda made me happy.

well, ending this, his mom's about to be here to pick me up cause we're going to target for party stuff.

love in all directions

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(no subject) [Jun. 7th, 2005|02:25 pm]
gee wiz. all better. boys are still stupid though. haley says: "you can't hold a grudge towards him for one thing he's done. he's dumb, and he was being a dick. tell him that thats what he was being, a dick."

yeah right...
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sweeet. [May. 28th, 2005|03:10 pm]
Yeah so I am bored, with something cool to tell yall...

So Eisley is back home from tour, they came to Mcalister's today, with the guitarest from New Found Glory (hate them but uhhh cool famous ppl, yeah.)

and they are playing at my church tomorrow, only Shay has to go dance with some lady at her church, she never asked, she just assumed he could... and now he's all sad... but his mom says she's going to try and get him out of that.

gee wiz, I got up at 7:15 this morning and was up at the theatre to do hair and makeup by 8. I was there until 1:30!!!!! its craaaazy...... I cannot wait until this is over and we can go back to small homeschool productions... alice and wonderland is next! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He looks so beautiful, it hurts me slightly.
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(no subject) [May. 23rd, 2005|12:20 am]
less fun..
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(no subject) [May. 21st, 2005|03:14 pm]

so, tonight is peter pan... =) shay is ... peter pan! its the city ballet, and I'm excited ... haven't hung out with him since 4:00 thursday morning, except he did come over after dance rehersal to look at my backyard, (brooke and I are having a joint brithday party!) (or is it joined?...) (this is me talking in secret... cool, right?) ok...


yes, I am bored. My favorite big sister has been in Maine since last Thursday, I'm so happy because my parents just left for Dallas to return her to me. That brings yet ANOTHER smile to my face =)


oh I'm bored... here's a couple of pictures...

brooke in a picture that is model worthy, agreed?


me.. wishing I was someplace else..


he steals my camera while I'm not paying attention. I end up finding the pictures of him late at night in bed when I look at pictures on my camera. He is lovely.

I got camera happy in the backyard... and fell in love with this flower...


and these...


shay, adorible, huh? he was ... "almost 12" lol





beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

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(no subject) [May. 18th, 2005|06:34 pm]

...going to see it at midnight, oooo yes. with my buddy ol' pal shay, and all the other nerds who go that late to see movies... hehehehe

heck yes.
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